Meadow's Mark

 Sooooo.....it's time to wrap up this month's trial and error for this month 😍😍😍 I haven't been able to keep up with my workout this last week. Life has been hectic. I've had quite a bit of projects in front of me and that has really, really changed my workout schedule. 🥴🥴 I am, however, picking back up yoga and meditation 🧘🏾‍♀️🧘🏾‍♀️ in place of my workouts. I'm waiting to see what the next month has in store for me fitness wise. I'm excited for the next step in my journey.....here's a side by side from week 1 and week 4 💗💗 I love my results. 

 🥴🥴 Let's just say the 1st 2 weeks were anomalies....🤔🤔 or maybe this week is the anomaly because I have NOT been on it. Idk what happened but the time shifted on me.  Between not keeping with my regular fasting hours ((I try intermittently fast from 8pm to 11am daily)) and homeschooling, working, writing my books and blog, eating, sleeping, trying to have fun, going through 2 different online courses, and numerous 1 off tasks that I'm sure I failed to remember, my days have gotten shorter and shorter. I literally need a nap as I type this 😭😭😂😂😂 It wasn't a complete flake. I did manage to get about 3 good workouts in this week. I also have been able to maintain some of the progress. And I am still proud of myself 😍😍😍💪🏾💪🏾 ((pics below))👇🏾👇🏾

 I always wondered whyyyyy it's okay to refer to grown women as girl but it's the ultimate disrespect to men when they're called boys.  What is it about grown women that doesn't warrant respect or growth or equality in the adult realm?! Why is that even something that women are okay with?! We work hard as mothers, wives, sisters, etc yet we're never recognized as grown, not even in our own minds.....just needed to get that off my chest. 

 Well, surprise, surprise. It's time for my 2nd update on how my workout sessions have been going 🏋🏾‍♀️🏋🏾‍♀️🏋🏾‍♀️🤸🏾‍♀️🤸🏾‍♀️🧘🏾‍♀️🧘🏾‍♀️. Let's just say I have 🤯🤯🤯 blown my own mind.  I've actually been working out CONSISTENTLY. I follow the schedule daily. It's been a really pumped up successful and productive week.  Okay, soo here are the exercises that I do: I don't actually do the squats because I don't really like them but I use the number and do that number of donkey kicks on each leg.  I actually do the crunches exactly as the picture dictates. I used to do 200 crunches a day && I loved my results soo i decided to keep these as is.  I am not a fan of planks soo I replaced the regular planks with lunges. I also replaced the side planks with standing oblique twists since I want to work on my love handles. I also replaced the crunches with a bridge exercise using the number as the amount of seconds I hold the bridge position. I do the b...

 Soo I figure with all this free time. I could commit to something ((preferably something to benefit my life)) when I'm not writing 🥴🥴.....for this month I'm going to go ahead && WORKOUT 🏋🏾‍♀️🤸🏾‍♀️🏋🏾‍♀️🧘🏾‍♀️ ((wish me luck 😉😉)). I wanted to see if these monthly fitness challenges work....or are they just click bait?! Should be a piece of cake, right?! I mean I did do 6 years in the military. Running 12 miles at least once a week for 4 of those years. Training in the mud. Sleeping in the field. Building our own tents. Rucking 16+ miles in boots. What's a little workout in the living room.....well, 2 pregnancies && a preschooler later, an actual piece of cake sounds MUCHHHHHHH better than the workout. 🤔🤔🤔  Okayyyy, fineeeee. I'll work out. I spent enough time body shaming my mombod since somewhere between the beginning of toddler stages to now. It's time I get back to what I was when I first gave birth. I lost all the weight. Felt amazin...

It's Monday... I'm excited. Monday is like the most motivational day for me. It's the start of the work week, school week, I'm rested after Sunday, and I'm definitely going to be reading a book later today 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾   What is there not to be excited about?! Now that we mentioned how motivating Mondays are ((because I seriously LOVE Mondays 😍😍)), I figured I'd talk about what motivated me to start this blog. I was searching for peace and once I found it, I became determined to share it.  With anyone. With EVERYONE! I feel like peace should be for all. Peace within. Peace without. Peace among. Peace for all. I also wanted to clear up the misconceptions on peace. It's not absence of bad days or negative energy, things, thoughts, or vibes. It's not happy all the time. It's not "positive vibes only✌🏾".  It's keeping calm during a toddler melt down. It's valuing your safety after a fender bender that made you late. It's enjoyed ...

 Soo I posted on IG about a poem that really resonated with me when I read it. It's from Songs of a Butterfly by Deanna Hill ((shameless plug, it's available on Amazon)) && I'm going to make my Tuesday Truth conversation about it.  "My favorite place to be Anywhere With your arms around me" If that isn't the realest thing ever.  Like EVER.  AS a woman in love, I feel that.  As a mom, I feel that.  As a daughter, friend, etc., I feel that. Even at my lowest, loneliest point in life, I felt that. I mean isn't that basic human instinct?! Sometimes we get forced into situations where survival instincts become all we know but even then we long for a safe haven. A comfort zone. A moment of rest.....of love......of peace. A moment where life isn't scary and things are okay. Even if it's just for a moment.....

 Being that my birthday was on a Sunday, this is my BIRTHDAY WEEK!!! It's only right that I celebrate that with everyone by SHARING MY BOOK!! 🤯🤯🤯🤯 Interstellar is currently available on Amazon for FREE until September16th!!!🎉🎉🎉🎉 That's right, FREE TODAY!! I do it because I love all of my readers and supporters. 😁😁😁😁 Head on over to Amazon and grab you a copy now!! INTERSTELLAR AVAILABLE at Www.amazon.com/author/ashleymark13  the link can also be found in the Meadow's Marks area of this blog. ❤

 This kid of mine is so divine And sublime  And all that good stuff But the part that really has me is the time you asked me to hug you as tight as I can. Laying in bed, your little eyes twinkling, fighting back yawns and dreams, you ask me if I'm gonna hug you like this forever  My heart melts at the thought.  If I could I would.  I've always dreamed of a love that never ended. Never broken.  Never deterred or soiled.  Always true and I found that with you.  But what you don't know, kid, is that even though you see forever with me, that can't be.  As you grow up, you leave like a baby bird's first time out the tree.  You're gonna soar high, higher than me to your reason for being, just like me.  I'm soo glad for you, kid, I really am.  That love waiting for you is even deeper than the one you have for me.  One day you'll see. And then that kid will wanna spend forever with me too.... 

In the spirit of the fast approaching ((in other words, already here)) birthday season && new beginnings in my life, it's only right that it spills over onto my blog. 😂😂 Allow me to start over. && I believe I should start with an introduction. ______ Welcome to my blog page && thank you for reading my posts. 😁😁😁Kinda like my virtual diary, but it's all good, right?! I mean I CHOSE to share it.🥴🥴😂😂 ______ I am Meadow Diaz, an author, blogger, mama, and soon to be LIFE COACH (( insert surprise🤯🤯 && applause 👏🏾👏🏾here )). I'm a fun loving, life living, proverbial free spirit that somehow follows soo many rules ((don't ask me how it's possible, just believe me when I say it)).....and apparently I'm always laughing ((these pictures say more than 1000 words about my laughter 😂😂😂)). Oh, and I'm on this longgggg journey of SELF love. It's pretty dope. Made it all the way to crop tops....in the house 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷...

Because gratitude is soo necessary and I will always be grateful for chances to be greater ❤❤ please, please go on over and follow Consuela MeAnn. Check out her YouTube channel. Watch my author interview and last but not least, purchase my books. You won't be disappointed. 🥰🥰🥰🥰 Tell Your Story interview I appreciate all of the support.  The love.  The likes.  The comments.  The views.  I am grateful!

 Because it's been a while and I haven't given my blog the love that it deserves. It's supposed to flourish in the same manner as all of my other writing outlets. It's like a journal....but online.....in public.....for the world to see and feel and touch ((with their eyes)). Just wanted to touchbase and leave a note.  I hope everyone is alright out there. Staying strong and holding on in this pandemic. This storm that has taken the world by surprise.  I started today with some affirmations.....and then some more came to mind during this check in. Soo here goes: I am strong.  I am present.  I am here.  I am in the moment. I am experiencing it all while remembering that this too shall pass, "good or bad". Today is a good day.  Today is my day.  I learn from my mistakes.  Feel great and live well, everyone. Today is your day too!!👋🏾👋🏾👋🏾

Because when you look good, you feel good! ______ 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 ______ Me and my friends have this conversation quite often. We uplift each other with words and speak straight to each other's spirits but at the end of the conversation, we make sure to account for what we've done for ourselves!! ______ 🥰🥰🥰 ______ In an effort to maximize my self love efforts, I did a whole wardrobe do over. My closet was full of clothes that I either liked but never really wore, bought because one day I would be the right body size to fit in it, or I bought it because I wanted the courage to change my style but never actually went through with it. The end result of years of shopping was a closet full of things that weren't "ME". 🥴😣😞 🧥🧦👗👚👙 Piece by piece, I changed that. When I bought a new shirt, I found an old one that had to go. If it didn't fit "ME" today, I got rid of it. I noticed that the clothes on my body felt increasing more comfortable as...

Marriage is about committing to growth. People tend to commit to who the person is at the time without allotting room for change......just sharing my thoughts. I'd like to think I know something about marriage considering it's something I want. Considering it's something I did before....for all the wrong reasons. But that's just it. Next time will have to be right. Because I've done it wrong so many times. Relationship after relationship down the drain. Time I'll never get back but of course it's all with a smile. It's like cutting all your hair off for a fresh start. Next time I'll have more experience. Next time I'll have more understanding. Next time I'll be patient. Patiently waiting.....but there really is no such thing as wrong. There's just either you tried or you didn't. I didn't try before. I ran. I cowered. I hid. I pretended. Fake smiles. Forced happiness. Shrunken personalities. Everything except a good ol...

You... uh..."working" again? John Wick: No, just sorting some stuff out. Except.....I am working again. Working harder than ever. In more ways than I expected. I'm still trying to figure out where I found the time but I don't dwell on it because I am BEYOND grateful that I found the time. Found the time to meditate daily. Found the time to say my affirmations daily. Found the time to write BOOK NUMBER 3 ((shameless plug😏😏)). Found the time to manage 3 IG accounts && continue to share the rawest pieces of me, little by little. Found the time to raise my child. Found the time to live life with him. Appreciate the sun and fun with him. Found the time to have mommy friends. Found the time for playdates and health and sleep. Found the time to eat ((because moms rarely have that)). I even found time to myself. This post was for gratitude and reflection and a moment to pat myself on the back and give myself a hug. I found the time to find ...

Because sometimes I think I'm too young for "crow's feet" 🤔🤔but then I remember that  I have a 4 year old && I usually look tired because  I stay up late trying to work on my personal/professional goals ((or occasionally catch up on a show that I can't watch when @just.jamelw is awake)). 😊😊😊 31 with "crow's feet" is just fine with me. I'm completely okay with having it show that I could use a nap after I've spent the whole day living it up. This set comes from an impromptu roadtrip to soak up some rays while cleansing in the sea. My spirit was in need of a trip to the water. 😏😏😏 I can rest tomorrow!!! #livingmybestlife #crowsfeet #improturoadtrips #HiltonheadIsland #nofilter

Because one of the hardest things I've ever experienced is the healthy relationship after the toxic one. ______ 🥴🥴🥴 ______ In a perfect world, there wouldn't be a toxic relationship.....but in the one I exist in, there's been many. Soo many terrible relationships to taint my view. 🤔🤔🤔 All in all, I wouldn't change a thing for the world. I wouldn't change the butterflies or the faux love or the expectations or the broken promises because that woke me up. ______ 😊😊😊 ______ When I met the man who inspired me to continue to bring forth the peace within, I had to take a hard look at myself. I had to see who I really was, flaws and all. I had to explore strengths and weaknesses I didn't even know I had. I found a beauty in me that I couldn't see until I laid eyes on this man. The healthy relationship comes with introspection and a mirror that will pick you apart faster than some women can pick apart their bodies. But it also comes with an abundanc...

So my baby boy is on a trip and every break I get is considered a vacation in my eyes.....Of course I don't give my self the whole break that I should. I relax. I sleep. I eat well. Shower good. Do my hair. Take care of me. Rest my brain and my body......but I still think on some things. I think about the future. The moments when he'll be taller than me. When he won't be my little man anymore. He'll have friends, more than he does now. He'll have a phone. A car. Places to go. People to see. A girlfriend. A wife. A house. A life. Health. Happiness. Prosperity. Everything I want for him. Those are mostly happy thoughts for me. It's slightly sad when I remember he'll never be my baby again. Never fit in my lap again. Or my arms. Or my belly. But I appreciate it all the same. These thoughts lead me to appreciate the parent I am able to be just that much more. It also makes me appreciate the parents whose children need extra care, love, and attention. Who l...

The act of being fit for a queen. The Queen. The most important player one the team. Taking hits to protect the kingdom. Moving in every direction. Setting of in any path she wants. Claiming her birthright. Making sure all is right. The act of being fit for a queen. Queenly. Queen Lee

I sit around thinking allllllll day long about the things I'd like to do. Listing them out like the very OCD individual that I am. Write Read Clean Posts pics Take pics  Quality time with my family  Homeschool  Eat Sleep Sleep being the most optional one 🥴🥴.....but of course I am getting enough sleep to function.....and quality time pauses my writing. Take this blog post for instance....I'm already on my 3rd "break" from writing to help my darling boy with things, like hugs and kisses or just to sit with him 😊😊.  I came into this "quarantine" with the thought that I would be super productive and accomplish......🕝🕑🕜🕣okay, I'm back. Only took a 5 hour "break" 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️ As I was saying. Thought I would be super productive and accomplish everything on my list and more. In all honesty, I've only now been able to get a handle on things. Even though it's been a dream of mine, homeschooling out of the blue kicke...

Early morning antics give me time to sit back and look at this ball of light that I've created. Energy moving soo fast that the time past. I'm wondering where it all went. My memories flood back. I remember that it went to the winter, and the fall, and the spring, and the summer before that. The one where I taught you how to act and walk and talk. I watched you smile and sleep. Now you're out here teaching me about the shapes, the colors, the stars and the moon. How to soar. How to just be more. How to stand tall in my purpose, even when I'm a little nervous. I love you more than you could imagine. The greatest being that ever happened. Every day with you is special. Every day takes the cake. Every day feels like Mother's Day!!! 🌻💙🌻

There's always more that I wish I knew Or do or did or want or need..... But in the end, the sands run out No matter how much you've accomplished Or didn't.... The only thing that last forever is the unknown. I wonder what that's like.....

Quarantine, Quarantine Please go away. Quarantine, Quarantine You cannot stay. Quarantine, Quarantine, Quarantine, Quarantine, Quarantine,Quarantine Please go away!!!! 🤯🤯🤯

Because I didn't appreciate my time in the outside world until they told me to stay home ______ 😫😫😫 ______ This "shutdown" has brought about a time of reflection. I have been looking at my goals and future plans. I already identified some things that I need to change but most importantly, I have appreciated the things I have already accomplished. The greatest part of this is the time I get to spend with my family 💜 ______ 🥰🥰🥰 ______ Ik this may be a trying to time for some but stress lowers the immune system. Now is the time for community and leaning on one another. This too shall pass && we'll need unity more than ever 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 #staysafe #washyourhands #eatwell #meditate #stressless #BeHAPPY

I never take the time to "free write" on here, which is weird since that was my reasoning behind creating my blog. I have had so many things occur in 2020 already. From several deaths to loss of friendship/camaraderie to loss of jobs to loss of self (temporarily). The curve balls thrown at me made it very clear that I am not in the space where I thought I was. I am not at the level of strength that I portrayed. I am not as put together as I planned to be. I realized I haven't allowed myself to grieve or deal or just be. I wasn't accepting of any of the things I experienced. I wasn't learning any lessons. I just existed. Just went with the flow like a leaf in the air. Landing wherever. Most of the time it felt like I was perched on top of the highest point of the highest building in the world. Or maybe right on the edge of the highest cliff in the mountains. On a low day, it felt like I was being trampled on by every late commuter on their way to work. Ignoring the...

Because the fact that I did this almost 10 years ago to the day did nothing to prepare me for this time around. No amount of time and experience makes grieving any easier but it does help to have loved onea by your side while you're going through it. 10 years ago, I was numb. 4 years ago, I completely broke down and could barely take care of myself. This time gave me strength and balance. The ability to express my feelings AND still push through.....now that I've read this to him, I can post it about him. ______ 💙🇹🇹💙 ______ When I met him, he was about 52 years old with a full face and brown eyes. His hair always neatly cut. Who would have known it'd be love at first sight, although I'm not sure which one of us felt it first. Over the years, we grew together. We didn't spend a great deal of time together but I can't think of a time when he wasn't there or near or close or around. The man I knew never said much to me but he always smiled and said he l...

What better way to immortalize you than to put you in the digital sky. Floating on a cloud, a trillion gigabytes away..... Or maybe you're only one kilobyte away and I don't know it. I can't see you because it won't load it. I release you to the cloud because you deserve to be with the highest..... Gone but never forgotten. Memories filled with love and warm hugs and cocoa puffs and smiles and tears of joy. And fluff and all kinds of happy stuff. All the things that clouds are made of, that's what you are now. I love you and I release you to the cloud.

He said "I don't care about that. I'd like to help you break the wall down." I smiled. Yea I'd like to let someone in. I think that'd be nice. I tried that before. I'm single now soo we see how that went. But it's not insecurity. It's security. Surety. I know what i want. What I deserve. I treat me the way I deserve to be treated. My walls have windows for my light to shine through. Don't come with shades. I'm liable to still blind you. I don't dim my light for others. There's no growth in that. But if you've come to plant, I can help you with that. Your seeds will flourish and grow in my yard. And maybe one day, these walls will come down. To make room for the garden we've built all around.

Justice and love are really good friends. Justice protects love. Justice wins again. But justice hurt love, what a crazy plot twist. Justice and love cannot coexist. Justice comes with an eye for an eye. How do you love someone after you made them cry? Do you help learn to live with the eye they have left? Do you make them see why they had to lose an eye? Do they know why they paid? Why you made them cry? Justice, oh justice is a cruel, cruel friend but maybe, just maybe, they're one that loves you to the end. How can love live in a world so objective? A world where our friendship doesn't exist once wrong is involved. Forget all the times that I helped you evolve. Or you helped me when I was down and out. Sick and mucking about. The times when I helped you deliver your baby. Or bury your family. Justice is justice and nothing else. Justice takes your arm when the time comes.... Justice and love will never be one.

The only one who can change your reality is YOU! When you get close to the edge of your comfort zone, push a little bit farther. You'll see the difference in the morning. 👌🏾👌🏾❤❤

Because family nights can double as date nights.....okay, soo lemme set the scene. It was new year's day around 11am. I could feel the energy in the house draining. The dreary weather didn't help either. That it's not raining but it looks eerily wet outside. Damp enough to feel the rain spirit. Muggy enough to be like is it going to rain?! Maybe the rain will start as soon as I get outside....anywho, it was that kind of day. I immediately jumped on my phone. The pressure was on. Can mom/bae save the day?! Will I be able to successfully juggle all the hats that I wear ((Not to mention, my dad is with us soo I'm wearing my daughter hat too && my adventurous/author hat as well 😂😂))?! Here comes Kate's skating rink to the rescue. Everyone can go skating and relive childhood memories, while creating new ones for my little one. I called a family meeting to discuss how superman....I mean supermom 🦸🏾‍♀️ came to the rescue.....the end result being I got EVERYONE ...

To the world you looked soo strong But to me, see I saw how vulnerable you could be I saw the times when your light didn't shine And you limped just a little The crack in each smile The tear in the corner or your eye I saw each line that appeared the more weary you grew The weight you lost and gained and all the times you looked the same I saw the opportunities you passed up And heard the prayers you said for good luck You asked for one thing over and over And here I came, the answer to your prayers The one thing you want the most When the world saw a legend, the beginning of an empire, the birth of a nation, an unsurpassable amount of strength, I gave you what you needed. I just saw you.....